Men may not ask you out on a first or second date because they feel they can’t afford you and may not continue to pursue you because they feel they can’t measure up.
What in the world does that mean?
In today’s society where many women have risen through corporate America and hold high paying jobs or started their own companies, they may not have a ‘need’ for a man to take care of her. Unfortunately, while she doesn’t need his income to maintain the style of living to which she has become accustomed, it can be emasculating to the man to evaluate her expensive tastes and realize that he just can’t keep up.
Some women talk about expensive taste because it helps them to weed out the men who CANNOT maintain their lifestyle, but others truly don’t know it’s even happening.
Have you been on a first date that seemed to go really well and then never got a call back? Suddenly you start questioning your ability to measure chemistry between yourself and another guy. It doesn’t seem to make sense that there were some sparks, you had the same interests, laughed at the same jokes but, still, no call back.
While you’re evaluating those dates, think about the comments you may have made about the drinks you enjoy (champagne?), the jewelry you wore (diamonds?), the names you dropped during the conversation or the places you’ve visited or vacationed. They may be interesting and fun stories, but they also indicate a lifestyle that may not be the same as his.
Maybe you don’t care that he’s an accountant at a large firm and satisfied with his current salary level because you’re looking for a companion who can meet other needs. You have the salary need met all on your own.
Now think about how that might feel to a guy who is used to being the one making more of the money (or most of the money) and how he is competing against your financial success.
Before dropping names, ordering expensive meals or drinks, or talking about your recent vacation at Vail, Colorado where you skied with the US Olympic team, you might want him to get to know you better. This kind of information is swallowed so much easier after he’s gotten to know the real you and can measure his discomfort against how much he really likes the real you.
On the flip side of this, you want to be careful when mentioning these things because you don’t want to end up with someone is after you solely for your money. It’s best to keep money and how much or little you spend out of the conversation until after you’ve gotten to know each other more.
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