His Friends and Family

Photo by Matheus Ferrero on Unsplash

Let’s say you’ve been dating for 2 months and he’s asked you to meet his friends and family. You have now reached level two of the relationship where you start meeting each other’s friends, relatives, and other significant people in each other’s lives.

This is a crucial junction which can make or break the next several months and can spell disaster for a long-term marriage type of relationship. Men are interested in their friends’ opinions of who they are dating just as women are. Men are not independent little souls who are adrift on a sea of despair until they meet their significant other.

Quite the contrary, usually. Often, men have friends they do ‘sports’ things with, ‘family’ type things,and just ‘hanging out’ type activities. These are the people that need to sign off on his relationship with you. As a relationship matures and moves forward you’ll do it around his friends and relatives. If the atmosphere is tense and problematic it’s likely he’ll choose them over you.

Most men don’t have a problem with conflict at work, but conflict in their personal relationships is a whole ‘nother story. To get rid of the conflict and strain, they will get rid of the thing that is causing it. And, unfortunately, you will be outnumbered – lots of friends and family against little ol’ you.

This is the time to lift your head, be yourself, enjoy his friends, and realize that any disagreements you have with them (serious ones) are bound to trickle into your own relationship.

It is important to be yourself because you can’t fake a personality for years to come. And, if the relationship with your guy has potential, then you may be looking at a commitment to these people for years to come.

Evaluate his friends and family and ask yourself if they could become your own friends and family. The reality is that if your relationship blossoms and you move in together or he slips a ring on your finger, those friends and family of his will quickly become yours!

And, it’s totally ok for you to not like all of them, but you shouldn’t allow your dislike to hinder his friendship with that person. Just as you wouldn’t want him to get in the way of your friendship with one of your girlfriends. This is assuming his friendship is with another man whom you are not fond of. Opposite sex friendships are a different ballgame to sort through.

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